Friday, February 7, 2014
ANNOUNCEMENT #2
Now that I am more used to writing on my new blog: www.mywriteangle.wordpress.com - I will be posting only there. I write about many things infertility and pregnancy loss among them. If anyone would like to contact me concerning those two things, you may do so by commenting on any of my posts on that blog. Love to all. -Jenny
Saturday, June 8, 2013
ANNOUNCEMENT
Hello! To all those who are curious, I will be posting more in the future at this site: mywriteangle.wordpress.com - I will also try to keep this blog up as my new one is not concentrated on infertility only. So, I will still post on here as often as I have been (or hopefully a bit more). I will have posts there concerning loss of pregnancy and infertility at this new address also, but it will be my general blog about many things. Just for everyone's information. :)
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Monday, October 8, 2012
Feeling Your Womanhood
Sisters, I have spoken about many aspects of loss of pregnancy and infertility. I have spoken of the fear of physical harm, the uncertainty of the right paths to take (or to take any at all), the grief and mourning over lost children.
But there is one part of these things I have yet to write about. I feel to do so now. My fellow women out there please hear this:
You are still a woman. I know sometimes in the dark of night, questions of worth arise. If your body doesn't do the things what you feel it was designed to do, sometimes you feel, well, undefined. Questions of worth concerning infertility or loss of pregnancy, any questions of worth, do not come from God. They come from one who would have you believe you are nothing. This is not the case.
I am not immune to these feelings. I am not immune to these questions. Sometimes when my daughter learns to do something new on her own, I feel her slipping more away from me and my purpose with her. This, also, is not the truth.
No matter if we hear this often or not, we need to hear it again. We have worth, we have purpose, we are daughters of a Heavenly Father who loves us and grieves with us. He knows the plan, but he hurts when we do. Whether we have 10 children or none, whether we are married or not, whether we have multi-million dollar careers or stay home and count the pennies, whether or bodies work perfectly in all their functions, or not, we are of the same worth to Him. We have value in this world. We can change lives beginning with our own. This is not to say we must do so on our own. There is no sorrow in asking for help, in prayer, and from those around us.
My love to all. My prayers with all those wondering of worth and hoping in the future.
"God sees you not only as a mortal being on a small planet who lives for a brief season—He sees you as His child. He sees you as the being you are capable and designed to become. He wants you to know that you matter to Him." - President DIETER F. UCHTDORF, 2nd counsler in the Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints - Link for the entire article: http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2011/10/you-matter-to-him?lang=eng&query=worth+women
But there is one part of these things I have yet to write about. I feel to do so now. My fellow women out there please hear this:
You are still a woman. I know sometimes in the dark of night, questions of worth arise. If your body doesn't do the things what you feel it was designed to do, sometimes you feel, well, undefined. Questions of worth concerning infertility or loss of pregnancy, any questions of worth, do not come from God. They come from one who would have you believe you are nothing. This is not the case.
I am not immune to these feelings. I am not immune to these questions. Sometimes when my daughter learns to do something new on her own, I feel her slipping more away from me and my purpose with her. This, also, is not the truth.
No matter if we hear this often or not, we need to hear it again. We have worth, we have purpose, we are daughters of a Heavenly Father who loves us and grieves with us. He knows the plan, but he hurts when we do. Whether we have 10 children or none, whether we are married or not, whether we have multi-million dollar careers or stay home and count the pennies, whether or bodies work perfectly in all their functions, or not, we are of the same worth to Him. We have value in this world. We can change lives beginning with our own. This is not to say we must do so on our own. There is no sorrow in asking for help, in prayer, and from those around us.
My love to all. My prayers with all those wondering of worth and hoping in the future.
"God sees you not only as a mortal being on a small planet who lives for a brief season—He sees you as His child. He sees you as the being you are capable and designed to become. He wants you to know that you matter to Him." - President DIETER F. UCHTDORF, 2nd counsler in the Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints - Link for the entire article: http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2011/10/you-matter-to-him?lang=eng&query=worth+women
Saturday, July 14, 2012
Daddies need support too...
I was just thinking about the fact that the men often get left behind when a loss of pregnancy happens. Even when people are concerned, it is usually with the woman. I'm not saying people shouldn't be concerned. But the men have lost a baby as well. They may have lost hope and faith. They not only have to deal with their loss, but also are in a place to best comfort the woman in their life.
Let us not forget those to-be Daddies. I am blessed to have a very supportive husband. Sometimes I need to remember that he is going through all this loss and infertility and roller coaster of hopes that I am. God bless him.
Let us not forget those to-be Daddies. I am blessed to have a very supportive husband. Sometimes I need to remember that he is going through all this loss and infertility and roller coaster of hopes that I am. God bless him.
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Steps in Life
I've started taking fertility medicine. Never thought I would. I'm not sure why it never really seemed like a choice to me until now. It gives me hope, but it also makes me scared. What if this doesn't work? What if it does help me to get pregnant but I lose the baby? I pray that when I do get pregnant again that everything will be good with the pregnancy. I pray that I will have a healthy baby and that we will both be good. I could wait ten more years if I could be sure that the next pregnancy I have would work out.
It is hard. It is scary. I was blessed to have my first positive pregnancy test end with my daughter joining our family. Since then I have been on a six year roller coaster that included an emergency surgery for an ectopic pregnancy, a D&C after a missed pregnancy, and many, many, many false pregnancy tests. It is hard to leave that behind. You can't, and maybe even shouldn't, leave it totally behind.I think those things would, unfortunately, be the first things that came to my mind if I see a positive pregnancy test.
I pray for strength and peace. For the knowledge that Heavenly Father loves and watches over me. That He knows what I need in my life and what the future holds a lot better than I do. That he is watching over the little ones that have to leave so early and the ones that are still waiting to come.
It is hard. It is scary. I was blessed to have my first positive pregnancy test end with my daughter joining our family. Since then I have been on a six year roller coaster that included an emergency surgery for an ectopic pregnancy, a D&C after a missed pregnancy, and many, many, many false pregnancy tests. It is hard to leave that behind. You can't, and maybe even shouldn't, leave it totally behind.I think those things would, unfortunately, be the first things that came to my mind if I see a positive pregnancy test.
I pray for strength and peace. For the knowledge that Heavenly Father loves and watches over me. That He knows what I need in my life and what the future holds a lot better than I do. That he is watching over the little ones that have to leave so early and the ones that are still waiting to come.
Wednesday, February 22, 2012
You never know...
So, just as I never knew so much about miscarriages and D and C's, I never knew so many women had endometriosis until I found out I was one of them. In fact, I'd never even heard of it before. So many women suffering in silence. We feel so alone sometimes, if only there was an easy way to know that there are others out there feeling the same way.
Here is my announcement: I have endometriosis. It is painful and frustrating and lonely. It is ever present, reaccuring, a constent reminder.
But...I have a name for what I have now. And with a name comes choices, friends, and sometimes hope. I must admit, I don't have this condition as badly as some others I know. But, I can still feel some of what they must feel. I can still be there.
You never know who has felt the burden you are feeling. You never know who is also feeling it at this moment. You are not alone.
"Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me." 1 Nephi 21:16 Book of Mormon - and Isaiah 49:16 Bible KJV
Here is my announcement: I have endometriosis. It is painful and frustrating and lonely. It is ever present, reaccuring, a constent reminder.
But...I have a name for what I have now. And with a name comes choices, friends, and sometimes hope. I must admit, I don't have this condition as badly as some others I know. But, I can still feel some of what they must feel. I can still be there.
You never know who has felt the burden you are feeling. You never know who is also feeling it at this moment. You are not alone.
"Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me." 1 Nephi 21:16 Book of Mormon - and Isaiah 49:16 Bible KJV
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